If there is one thing that is true about me, it’s that I completely hate flying. It’s not the inconvenience of a late flight or a missing bag (all of which are seriously annoying), it’s the fact that I’m actually scared of flying in the sky. I need to be in control to feel safe and I am most definitely not in control when I’m in the hands of a pilot.
In May, I was in Atlanta for the NSAC/AAF National Competition. When we were scheduled to take off, there was a line of 30+ other planes that were ahead of us in line. Literally, 30 planes. By the time it was our turn, we had to go back to the airport to refuel before we were safe to fly. We ended up being many hours late to out next destination, Minneapolis, and ended up having to spend the night in the airport. The next morning our group had to separate so that we could make it home. Did I mention that our college graduation was mere days later? We had to get back. It was awful, I have never had a flying situation like that before. It seems that these days, flying has just become a huge hassle. My mom keeps saying over and over again that “flying isn’t glamorous anymore.”
Virgin Atlantic has noticed this also. And, they have a response to everyone. Virgin Atlantic is “glad you hate flying.” What? Should an airline trying to make profit really say that? They want people to hate flying so they can look forward to flying on Virgin Atlantic. It’s all part of their “Airphoria” campaign. Virgin Atlantic wants passengers to feel excitement and anticipation when flying their airline. They offer completely flat beds for sleeping as well as an open-all-the-time bar. These are two things (especially the second perk) that would make me look forward to flying on Virgin.
This unique airline made the terrible attitude about flying into the perfect opportunity. They saw an opening in the market and ran with it. In looking at their website, though, I don’t think they fly within the U.S. Too bad, because Virgin would have been a great airline for me to fly to see my friend Emily in New York. And, despite my fear of flying, next time I need to fly internationally from San Francisco (my new home), I will certainly start with looking at Virgin. The complete bar is reason enough.
October 6, 2008 at 3:02 pm |
First, by way of introduction, I’m both an airline captain and a licensed therapist. Working with people who have trouble with flying has been my specialty for twenty-eight years.
There is a great deal of misunderstanding about the cause of fear of flying. It is not caused by a bad flight; most people on a bad flight don’t develop fear of flying. Difficulty with flying is caused by insufficient ability to regulate feelings when facing uncertainty.
Research since the advent of the functional MRI just eight years ago has helps us understand how the brain works. We now recognize that the ability to regulate feelings is learned and that the part of the brain that does this regulation requires stimulation of the right kind during the first two years of life. The right kind of stimulation requires a caregiver who is empathically attuned to the infant and responds to the infants signals, rather than simply providing for the infant according to an agenda set by the caregiver.
If the child is afraid, the caregiver needs to tune into the child’s fear in a way the child really knows the caregiver feels the same way. Thus the child knows he or she is not alone.
Then, the magic happens; the caregiver then lets the child know that — though the child’s fear is 100% shared — the adult has an additional point of view, which is that it is not the end of the world; it will work out alright.
Many of us, obviously, didn’t get such optimal early development. Thus, when facing uncertainty, we control our anxiety by being in control of the situation, or by having a way to out of it.
That works fairly well on the ground — except for annoying those who regard us as control freaks. But when flying, there is uncertainty, of course. And, not being in control and not having a way out, there is no way to regulate the feelings.
I have tried to give a good understanding of the cause and cure of fear of flying in a video at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zcx6ZsvKHSA&feature
Also, at
http://www.fearofflying.com/video_hs.shtml
January 8, 2009 at 8:19 pm |
I hope no one who’s scared of flying looks at my website (the original Airphoria) http://www.airphoria.co.uk